It's Official

I'm going to need surgery on my torn ACL.  I knew this was going to be the case when the MRI technician told me he couldn't FIND my ACL in the first place.  I had a choice to make in the orthopedists office, though.  I could either get mad at myself, or move forward and learn about my options.  I allowed myself to silently repeat the fuck word at different volumes within the confines of an inner monologue, and then chose the more proactive choice. 

I asked about my surgery options.  I could either have my tendon replaced by a part of the patella tendon, which would cause me to have a missing part of THAT tendon as well as a healing ACL.  Or, I could get a replacement tendon from a cadaver.  The differences are essentially nonexistent.  The deciding factor for me was the interval of time that would elapse between today and the day I become a scarred monster.  The cadaver surgery wins.  Although it is going to be more expensive, it will be done sooner, and that is the important issue for me.  I can deal with price, they have installment plans and financial assistance and all of that crap, I just want this to be done. 

I have had enough of feeling like I'm under house arrest and needing people to help me get up and down the stairs like some sort of legless go-tard.  Part of the reason why this silly blog exists in the first place is for me to vent a little and get my writing chops back, as they have deteriorated to an inappropriately sour level.  What I need to do now is get myself back to some sort of routine.  I don't give a fuck what the doctors say, I'm not staying at home.  I have to work.  I have to be out.  I have to make my life as normal as possible, with the slight adjustment of being injured.

I did get some really good news though.  As of today, I am down to one crutch.  I can walk, to a degree, with one crutch, which frees me up to do a lot of stuff that I couldn't before.  I have been fitted with a new brace that will allow me to bend my knee, but won't allow lateral movement in the knee. 

After surgery, however, that is, whenever I can get it scheduled (1-4 weeks per the secretary of nothing at the doc's office), I have to be in a leg long knee immobilizer for up to 2 weeks with the leg locked in a pin straight position to advance the healing process.  I do get a cool machine that keeps the leg cold so swelling doesn't go balls crazy.

I look forward to getting this process underway.  I have to look forward.  Looking behind is going to kill me.

SD