Crutches be damned

Ha! I don't have to use the crutches anymore.  I get to walk about like a person.  With a limp.  Actually, my mobility is closer to shuffling than walking at this point, but the fact of the matter is that I can ambulate without the use of aluminum aides.  The amount of apparatus that I have to use in order to get around is dwindling, and dwindling rather quickly, for that matter.  I still have to use the big bulky brace, but I expected that.  I'm okay with that as well.  I don't see the problem with scuffling around town in a brace, I see a problem with not being able to move about at all.  I don't have that problem anymore. 

When I will be able to drive, I still don't know.  It is going to be a couple of weeks before I can move without the brace on as well.  But, I can get about without it on in my apartment, so long as I use one crutch as a balancing aide.  In that respect, I still technically need at least one crutch, but at the same time, that is one less than I needed before, and I only need it when I don't have the brace on.  That means that, in the morning, when I have special bathroom time, I need to use the crutch to help me get to the shower and whatnot, but if I have the brace on, I no longer need the crutches.  I want to take advantage of this situation, but I fear that I am going to push it too much and wear myself out.  It's not like I can move fast with just the brace, like I said before, I shuffle around.  I hobble like one of my legs is longer than the other, and I still have trouble with stairs.  But progress is being made, so why dwell on the less-than parts.

I have been going out around town.  Running errands during the day and going out on the weekends.  I guess if I can manage that, I can get about without too much trouble.  I want to get back to a normal life.  Getting back to work is going to be a milestone.  Not only will that mean that I have some income flowing in, but it will give me something to do during the day, which is important.  I don't like being bored, and getting back to work will help to alleviate some of that strife.  Hopefully by next week I can get back in there.  We'll see where my strength and progress gets me by that point and go from there.  I don't think I will be able to get in there full time or anything, but a few hours when it is quiet each day is a good start.  I just need some money coming it.  I feel like all I do is spend.  Rent, bills, and now medical bills are sapping not only my bank account but also my good mood.  When I get a new bill in the mail, from whatever crazy ass thing I had to go through, I get a little more frustrated.  I shake my head and roll my eyes, take a deep breath and fill out a form with credit card info that goes off to somewhere that gladly takes the money that I need for whatever I might need it for.

I was going to spend that money on a shiny suit.  Not anymore.  Dammit.

SD